What a year.  It was a really really good year.  It was full of ‘kind of’ committing to recovery from amenorrhea and then falling off the train again. It was full of learning to really focus on WHY I needed to recover and WHY I needed to take those 2-3 days 100% off of exercise per week. 

 It was full of anxiety over whether I would gain weight or not if I didn’t exercise for 1-3 days a week, and it was also full of freedom.  It was full of learning to focus on the blog friendships, the Instagram friendships I need to develop, and not spread my small human energy too thin.  It was full of learning the greatness, the magnificence of God who never tires, knows everything about us, knows me, and yet STILL chose to love and rescue me out of darkness into His marvelous light.  

I can’t tell you just how much of an awesome and hard year it was.  

This year:

– The Lord enabled me to do over 80 podcasts.  

– The Lord healed my digestive pain in a LARGE part.  

– I’ve had more natural periods than ever before.   

– I’ve taken off more time from exercise than ever before.

– The Lord has delivered me from an addiction to running.  I don’t feel like I NEED it like I did to help me deal with problems or hard things.  

– The Lord gave me the hard lesson of being contented even when it seems like your friends are getting gifts you want.  He taught me that He’s sovereign over EVERY gift given and received, and I should not be chafing against what His perfect plan is.  

– The Lord gave me PRECIOUS precious blog friends that have encouraged me in the Lord, encouraged me to pray more, laugh more, be more grateful.  

– The Lord delivered me from fear over what people thought of the way I ate, of what people thought of the way I played ping pong, of what people would think if I said, ‘No,’ and boy am I praising God!   Deliverance from fear is incredible.

Psalm 34:1-7, ‘

I will bless the LORD ^pat all times;

his praise shall continually be in my mouth.

2  My soul ^qmakes its boast in the LORD;

let the humble hear and ^rbe glad.

3  Oh, ^smagnify the LORD with me,

and let us exalt his name together!

4  I ^tsought the LORD, and he answered me

and delivered me from all my fears.

5  Those who look to him are ^uradiant,

and their faces shall never be ashamed.

6  ^vThis poor man cried, and the LORD heard him

and ^wsaved him out of all his troubles.

7  ^xThe angel of the LORD ^yencamps

around those who fear him, and delivers them.’  

– I took so many walks and runs with huskies.   I also cried and prayed when they got out, and I learned that God really really cares about our animals.  

– The Lord gave me the opportunity to do photo shoots with my blossoming photographer sister and learn that you can do photos of yourself for the glory of God, the One Who Made us! 

– I baked more, and I felt more free to eat what I baked with all the butter, sugar, white flour.   

– I felt SOOO much less anxious about going out to eat or traveling and missing workouts.   

Some of their accounts that have encouraged me in my walk with the Lord and in recovery this year are:  

Modestly Made

Cooks and Kicks

Trying to Be Nicole

Live Healthy and Free 

Kalee Fighting With Faith

Bucket List Tummy RD

The Real Life RD 

Restoring Radiance

– The Lord gave me the opportunity to trust Him even in a relationship that didn’t turn out how I thought it would at the beginning.

– The Lord gave me wisdom about where to focus my time 

– The Lord gave me the humbling of showing me how weak I was when we had my precious grandma with us for 7 weeks.  

– The Lord taught me the preciousness of heaven and Jesus’ promise of resurrected life when we said goodbye to my Grandma.  

– The Lord taught me that I’m not the one responsible for making everybody happy.  

– The Lord showed me that I need to take time to slow down and really cherish what people share with me, cherish the moments, not rush through 500 podcasts, look at 300 recipes on Pinterest, or tweet 100 tweets in 20 minutes.  I tend to be such a ‘rush-rush’ person in everyday life things, that the Lord has shown me that there is SO much sweetness in slowing down, being still before Him, asking Him for strength and focus for each task and not trying to focus on too many at once.  

I was so encouraged by other bloggers this year especially: 

Megan Hallier 

Laura and Her Family Moment’s Posts and Her Recipes

Katalyst Health and Her LOVE for Women Being Strong (Not Anorexic)

The AMAZING Donut Recipes from Good Things Baking

And of course I am always encouraged by Sarah and her thoughts on eating, balance, rest, exercise and FOOD FREEDOMMMMM!!!!

And now going into the next year I am hopeful and happy about getting to: 

Share More Podcasts about My Recovery From Hypothalamic Amenorrhea

Find More Stories of Those Who Have Recovered from EDs to share With You 

Share More About Relationships and Learning to Be OK with where you’re at 

Sharing More About Contentment and Thriving as A Single

 Now I would love to know if you want to comment:

What was the highlight of 2018 for you?  

What was the hardest and best thing in 2018?  

What is one of your prayer requests to end the year?   

What will you focus on this year?